relationship_featureThe Ask Hafeez Column presents:

“Understanding Mating”

 

V-What is “Mating” and why is it important?

Abdul Hafeez(AH)-Let us begin with the meaning of the word “mating”; which signifies that two species of the opposite sex come together for the purpose of procreation. The science of unalike attracts and alike repels renders that all reproduction can only take place between the male and the female. There is much wisdom to be found here with regards to this worlds push toward alternative lifestyles, however alike couples no matter how much love they say are between them will never have the ability to experience mating between the two. Each will have to seek resolve in the opposite of their partner in order to reproduce.

Mating implies physical reproduction yet there is a higher purpose in mating. This process represents the perseverance of a race, people and a nation. Mating is important because legacies are maintained through this process; children are reared mathematically rather than without concern for outcomes. Mating represents the joining together of pairs and in this regard no pair is greater than the glory of Allah (God) which is the man and the woman. When the union of the male and female is performed properly the end result will be manifested from generation to generation. This world doesn’t desire the proper development of family: it promotes values that are opposed to what the creator desired for human elevation into becoming God.

We as black people were not taught these sciences because it was known by the wise that the original man and woman would one day rule again and our rise would represent the fall of our open enemies. This science is found in the teachings of the Honorable Elijah Muhammad must be extracted and applied to reverse what the enemy has set in motion; and fulfill what Allah revealed to him that we will become the Perfect Rulers.

V -What suggestions do you have for sisters who have been single for 5, 7, or 10 years about keeping the faith?   

AH -I have witnessed our beloved Minister Farrakhan inform the sisters of the MGT&GCC to remain patient and trust in Allah and the Messenger that you will be guided to the right brother (FOI) for you. The Holy Qu’ran in Sura 2 Ayat 45 says: “Seek assistance through patience and prayer, and this is hard except for the humble ones”…..  When we are humble before the lord then we can see him in everything around us and we can decipher the good ones from those who are not. When we are impatient then we make decisions in haste and then waste a part or parts of our life, leaving one full of regrets and sometimes spoiling that sister for the right brother that Allah is preparing for you. Prophet Muhammad once said: “One learned Muslim is harder on the devil than a thousand ignorant worshippers”; continue to study to improve yourself spiritually, mentally, morally and economically for the benefit of yourself, family and nation and Allah will prepare the same for you in a good mate.

 

V-Are we becoming too picky and making too many excuses? Are we looking for perfection saying he doesn’t have this, she doesn’t have that? What should we be looking for?

 

AH – What we should be looking for in a mate is one who compliments and compensates your shortcomings. Write a list of your personal advantages and disadvantages. The one you are courting should help in the area of your disadvantages. You need a mate who is the opposite of yourself and will buttress you as you will them in their areas of need. A single person can be too picky when it comes to choosing a mate because of past relationships that didn’t work out as one though they would. Others just set a bar so high but never look at themselves and what they bring or don’t bring to the equation.

Since we are born in sin and shaped in iniquity according to the Bible, none of us have all that we should have when entering into courtship or dating for those in the community who use such language. We all fall short of the glory of God; therefore there is no perfection among any of us. The prerequisite for courtship that leads to marriage and family life is the knowledge of yourself, so invest the time in self improvement. For nearly five years on my radio program in NY I would always close with one of two statements “To develop means to grow; to improve means to change; and we all need change”.

 

Min. Abdul Hafeez Muhammad(Abdul Hafeez Muhammad is Student Minister of Mosque #7 and is Minister Louis Farrakhan’s New York Representative for the Nation of Islam.  Marriage Counselor and Writer who resides in New York City with his family. Look for his book upcoming book, Lessons in Relationships.)